There seems to be a trend in our American society. In our fast-paced, dispersing, diverse society. Each time a new shooting occurs conversations circle around stupidity, hatred, gun control, mental illnesses. After the most recent events at Sandy Hook I heard a woman say, "Well, he has to be stupid in order to do something like that." We place blame wherever we can see fit, countless reasons to fathom.
We see what is there, but we do not notice what is lacking. And the blame is on each and every one of us, as a nation. We consider those who separate right and wrong as mentally "normal" and people who do these tragic things as just not "fit enough" to handle life's harsh lessons. I, personally, am frustrated with the judgment and hatred we put towards those who commit crimes because we feel we need to defend those who have suffered in ways no person should ever have to.
For each crime that is committed, we are all responsible no matter how physically distant from the act we are. And that is because we are an interconnected community, yet we do not function the way a community should. Really a "community" is a very hypocritical concept in America. Truer acts of this are presently rarely seen in the states.
If we are to be a community then we are held responsible for looking out for one another; our neighbors, friends, family members, local residents, and others further away. We would think about how our wasteful actions affect those downstream. We wouldn't hear a child's parents beating him/her nextdoor and allow it to continue. Cruelty of several kinds would be very difficult to pull of. Accountability would have a greater value to us. But oh how we so desire to live reclusive lifestyles in the beautiful countryside where nobody can judge us for our mistakes. I resonate with the latter concept, and is why I bring it up.
I recently read about an island in Greece(really there are a few in Greece with the same results) that is known for residents experiencing lengthy and healthy lives. One key, among several, was the tight knit community. “Even if you’re antisocial, you’ll never be entirely alone.” (NYT article on Sardinia). It is not just about healthy lives in terms of length, but about how they are living.
If we were to hold each other accountable imagine how our nation could change. We DO need people to comment on our mistakes. We do need others to see us slip up, laugh with us and allow us to grow without inhibition. There is not a lot of science or research behind the next thought, but if we took these measures I believe there would be less violence, less mental illnesses, less inmates, less elderly forced into nursing homes, less unhappiness, etc. We can do more good as a national community if little by little we set examples for each other. Becoming so close with one another is quite foreign and uncomfortable at first. It means always having someone asking how you are doing, or to go out for a snack and conversation and not just surfacing questions but digging deep into your well being. But it is well worth the initial aggravations. I am very much guilty of taking advantage of introvert behavior rather than seeking out a friend for a laugh or serious talk. And maybe that is our crutch. It is just so easy to find an escape and excuse. We don't like people to say negative things about us, no matter how constructive it may be. But how will we ever grow as people if we don't hear those things?
Our DNA desires for us to be social. What happens when you put a social animal in a cage by itself?
